All the really good stuff – food, music and women – is from the South
You ever had something you wanted to say that comes straight from the heart? Something that you know without question to be true, and something that you feel the need to say out loud?
Well, that’s the kind of feeling I have today, a deep down need to say something that needs to be said, something that lots of us know to be true, and so, here and now, I’m going to say with pride: "All the really good stuff comes from the South."
It’s true, you know, all the really good stuff does comes from the South. I’m not saying it to brag, gloat or to put down other regions of the country. I’m just stating what seems to me to be patently obvious.
And I’m not even talking about some of our good stuff like the weather, azaleas, dogwood trees, Jack Daniels, boiled peanuts and the like. I’m just saying in general that most of the really good things that we love as a nation come from the South.
Think not? Well, just check out the following:
The very best music comes from the South. Just the fact that Elvis was a Southerner says all I need to say, but you can also add in Roy Orbison, Jerry Lee Lewis, Little Richard, Hank Williams Sr., Hank Williams Jr., B. B. King, George Jones, James Brown, the Allman Brothers Band, John Lee Hooker, Grandpa Jones, Johnny Cash, Buddy Holly, the Atlanta Rhythm Section, and so many other great Southern musical talents that it would take pages to list them all.
Southern music can make you tap your feet, kiss a pretty girl, pat your favorite dog, and can even cause you to eat a sandwich faster than you normally would. It’s the very best music there is, and there’s not much of an argument that can be mounted against it.
The very best athletes and sports teams come from the South. Why, right here in Georgia we enjoy both the Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets and the University of Georgia Bulldogs, both nationally known and respected, with colorful and storied sports histories.
Take a quick look over at Statesboro and witness what Georgia Southern has accomplished on the football field over the past few years.
And these are just our Georgia based teams. They also happen to play some pretty good football in Florida, South Carolina, North Carolina, Texas, Arkansas, Alabama, Tennessee and Virginia. And let’s not forget Louisiana, where anyone who has half a brain knows that the LSU Tigers were clearly the best team in the nation last year.
How do we know that? Well, they had to beat a lot of other good Southern teams to even get to the national championship game, and I have no doubt that a couple of the teams LSU beat along the way would’ve handed USC their heinies, had they been allowed the opportunity.
Wanna talk about food?
Well, here in our neck of the woods there’s Cajun, Southern home cooking, Krispy Kreme Doughnuts, Nu-Way hot dogs, biscuits and gravy, black-eyed peas, cheese grits and a whole lot more.
A cold drink is a cold drink here, not pop, soda or God knows what else other people call them.
Wanna consider the quality of life? Well, please tell me how people each year voluntarily leave Georgia, Florida or any other Southern state to move up to New Jersey? Well?
And last, but not least, let’s discuss the South’s greatest asset: its women.
Nothing is softer than a true Southern belle, her kisses are the sweetest, her hugs the warmest, and the sound of her laughter can make a man’s heart smile a thousand times over.
A true Southern woman knows how to be a lady out in public, and how to be a woman when the time is right for that. I’d say even more, but if I get much more into this I’m gonna get my heiny parched, so let’s just say that good Southern women are like a prime piece of pecan pie – soft, nourishing and with just a tiny bit of kick to them.
So there you have it, the truth behind why the South is without question the premier area of our nation. Now, in all fairness, a few people out there may not agree with what I’ve just said, but the facts are the facts.
My advice to them when considering the South would be to read and take to heart this quote from another favorite son of the South, the greatest wrestler of all time, the Nature Boy Ric Flair, who sums it up best like this: "Whether you like it, or don’t like it, you’d better learn to love it, cause it’s the best thing goin’ today!"