Monday, March 11, 2013
Deciphering Ed Sebesta

Ed Sebesta has broken new ground. His post announcing his latest project has to be the most impenetrable prose the Internet has ever seen.

Behold: has published an article on using the historical memory of the Confederacy of jurors to screen out racially biased jurors written by Euan Hague and myself. I am now contacting persons and groups who would be interested in having juries free of racial bias as to how this proposed method of pre-screening jurors could be implemented.

Allow me to catch my breath.

The fun thing about a word salad like this is the unexpected word groups that pop up as you try to puzzle it out. For example, what on earth is "the historical memory of the Confederacy of jurors"? Did jurors get together and form their own confederacy?

And the part about screening out "racially biased jurors written by Euan Hague and myself" is even more mind-blowing. Does that mean "racially biased jurors" are only literary creations Sebesta and Hague made up?

Here’s my translation: Ed Sebesta wants the courts to dismiss any potential juror who is an SCV member or merely owns a Confederate flag. Yes, Ed Sebesta is THAT obsessed with the South.

This is so howling-at-the-moon nutty that even the anti-Southern Civil War Memory dismissed Sebesta’s post as "truly bizarre." One regular commenter noted that even she, a self-described "Yankee anti-secessionist," could be rejected by Sebesta’s odd, poorly conceived criteria.

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